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Kendall and Bexar County Estate Planning

Texas Estate Planning Blog

Kerrville estate lawyer can help you talk with aging parents
Shawn McCammon
Shawn McCammon
Attorney at Law

Shawn McCammon is the founder and managing shareholder of McCammon Law. Shawn has been practicing for over 20 years, starting off in litigation before working in-house as a corporate attorney, and finally opening his own firm in 2009.

Learn More About Shawn

What Happens If Aging Parents Won’t Discuss or Are Ill-Informed about Estate Planning?

January 7, 2025
What should you do if your parents have asked you to help manage their estate plan, but they refuse to tell you what their estate plan is—or to answer any of your questions?

Talking to aging parents about estate planning can be challenging, but it’s an essential conversation to have. Without a solid estate plan, families may face unnecessary legal battles, emotional strain, and financial confusion. As a trusted Kerrville estate lawyer, McCammon Law understands the delicate balance required to broach this topic and offers strategies to ease the process.

Why Aging Parents Avoid Estate Planning Discussions

Many parents avoid estate planning because they believe discussing it will burden their children or make them uncomfortable. Ironically, this hesitation can lead to the very burdens they wish to avoid. Without clear instructions, families may struggle to make medical and financial decisions during crises.

Other common misconceptions include:

  • Believing children or spouses automatically have legal authority to make decisions without proper documents like a Power of Attorney (POA) or Healthcare Proxy.
  • Assuming an executor of a will can act as a POA, which is not legally accurate.

A Real Life Example of Parents Who Would Not Discuss an Estate Plan

For the past 10 years, a librarian in southern California has lived in a no-win situation. Andre, one of four siblings, agreed to serve as executor—but their parents won’t say anything about their assets, their wishes, or their estate plan. This situation, detailed in the article “Estate Plan Crisis: What To Do When Your Parents Won’t Communicate” from next avenue, is common and will test sibling relationships unnecessarily.

The only thing Andre knows is that each parent has a financial and medical Power of Attorney for the other. This legal document names a person, referred to as the “agent,” who can fulfill the person’s wishes if they become incapacitated. If you have a POA, you should also have a successor POA. In the case of Andre’s parents, where both parents are elderly, having a backup is paramount, as it’s entirely possible both parents could be incapacitated at the same time. In keeping with their closed-door policy, Andre’s request for an alternate POA was denied, with parents claiming the executor would automatically have power of attorney if they become incapacitated. This is simply wrong. The POA dies with the person.

Conversations with Andre’s siblings were as fruitless as the conversations with their parents. They didn’t want to get involved, even though they may be more qualified than Andre to manage an estate.

Essential Estate Planning Documents in Kerrville

Many elderly people say they don’t want to create an estate plan to be a burden on their children. However, this is completely backwards. Having an estate plan created by an experienced estate planning attorney reduces the burden, giving offspring the tools to carry out their parent’s wishes and making life easier for them. To protect your family, certain legal documents are indispensable:

  1. Powers of Attorney (POA): Allows a trusted individual to make financial and medical decisions if parents become incapacitated.
  2. HIPAA Release and Advanced Healthcare Directives: Ensure access to medical records and clarity regarding medical wishes.
  3. Wills and Trusts: Define asset distribution and minimize probate complexities.
  4. Guardianship Designations: Vital for families with minor children to ensure care aligns with parents’ wishes.

When these documents are in place, families gain clarity and control over future scenarios.

How to Start the Conversation

Opening the dialogue about estate planning requires sensitivity and planning:

  • Pick the Right Time: Choose a calm and private setting to discuss these sensitive matters.
  • Focus on Their Wishes: Frame the conversation around honoring their values and ensuring their legacy.
  • Enlist Professional Help: A trusted Kerrville estate lawyer can facilitate the discussion and provide clarity on legal matters.

Consequences of Avoiding Estate Planning

When estate planning is neglected, the repercussions can be severe:

  • Courts may appoint guardians or administrators who don’t reflect the family’s preferences.
  • Medical and financial decisions could fall to individuals unfamiliar with the family’s wishes.
  • Sibling relationships may strain under the pressure of navigating unplanned situations.

By addressing estate planning proactively, families can avoid these pitfalls and foster peace of mind.

The Role of a Kerrville Estate Lawyer

McCammon Law guides families through the estate planning process with care and professionalism. Whether it’s establishing a trust, drafting a will, or updating documents to reflect Texas laws, our team ensures every step is seamless and personalized.

Take Action Today

It’s never too early to prepare for the future. Secure your loved ones’ peace of mind and honor your parents’ legacy by requesting a consultation with a Kerrville estate lawyer at McCammon Law.

 

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Boerne, TX 78006

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